Uncle Horn Head

Have a long signature line – The longer the better. Ten to fifteen lines would be right in this case. Use it to publicize your uncle’s life insurance agency or to tell every one about your grandmother’s real estate company. Think of it as a billboard. You might even be able to sell advertising space in your email signature if you send enough.
Send many attachments – This helps make your email so big it will take a long time to download it. Photos are good, as are links to web sites that you’ve visited where your computer acted strangely afterward. As a bonus, you just might sneak in a virus you didn’t know you picked up. On a related topic…
Don’t tell the recipient why you’re sending the attachments – This is even sweeter when the attachments have strange names that give no clue as to what they are. Big fun!